Saturday, 11/30/13

Very emotional, draining day...and it didn't even cross my mind to eat over it!  Miracles can happen!  :)


Breakfast: Banana Berry Rice Cereal

Applesauce

Lunch: Mashed Potatoes and Mushroom Gravy

Dinner: Buffalo Potato Wedges; Buffalo Tofu, celery, Ranch Dressing





Celery & Banana Platter - courtesy of GracieGirl:)

Thanksgivng Anxiety and Self-Acceptance

I put a lot of energy into freaking out about spending Thanksgiving with Nick's extended family.  Not as much as I've done other years, but it was still a lot... 


I was anxious about a lot of things:

1. I'm fat.

2. I eat differently than everyone else.

3. People would talk about my diet and then wonder why I was fat on a plant-based diet.

4. People who hadn't seen me since I put on so much weight.  Again.

5. Having to take family pictures.

6. Feeling like I ruin the family pictures because I'm fat.

7. I'm gray.  I love my gray hair but most people hadn't seen it yet and I didn't want one more thing to draw attention to myself.

8. I'm fat.

So...lots of anxiety, lots of putting Nick in a bad place as I anguished about having to go.  I tried to work on acceptance, but I'm not there yet.  I managed a little bit, but not enough to take away the anxiety.


The outcome?  I had a great time!  Nobody threw up when they saw me; in fact, I repeatedly heard how glad different people were to see me there.

I brought my dinner, and no one cared about what I ate.  Nick had said that he would eat a plant-based meal with me so that I would be more comfortable, and I honestly don't know if he did or not, and he was sitting right next to me!  That's how little attention I paid to what anyone else was eating: just as little attention as anyone paid to what I was eating!

One person asked if I was a vegetarian, and when I said yes, she said that she was, too.  Then she asked if I was vegan, and I said yes.  She said that she could never give up her cheese and eggs...and then proceeded to talk about herself.  It just wasn't a big deal.

I survived the pictures, but I did so by saying what I wanted.  I didn't want to sit down (most of my weight is in my stomach); I wanted to stand.  So I stood.  I haven't seen the pictures yet.  There have been a number of times that I've gone out, thinking that I looked okay, only to be devastated when I saw pictures of myself!  I'm working on changing my attitude about that.



I was thankful for feeling well enough to spend the holiday with my family, which included cooking my own meals the day before, and several hours of travel on Thanksgiving day.  I couldn't have pulled that off six months ago.  Last year, I spent almost every holiday alone because I was too sick to travel, which was really hard.  I didn't feel deserted because I encouraged Nick to take the kids so that they wouldn't miss out, but it was still difficult being alone.

On Thanksgiving, and on every day, I'm working on enjoying the journey, and acceptance of myself and where I am in the journey.  I know that I'm heading in the right direction, taking it one step at a time.  I'm sometimes my own worst enemy, but I know that if I can accept the here and now, my journey will be easier and more enjoyable.

Friday, 11/29/13

Breakfast: Mixed Berry Pie

Lunch: Pumpkin Pie Pudding

Dinner: Thanksgiving Leftovers: Mashed Potatoes, Stuffing, Mushroom Gravy, Green Beans, Mushrooms & Onions

Thursday, 11/28/13 ~ Thanksgiving

Amazing day today!  Too tired to write about it, but I'll try to share it tomorrow.  As far as food goes, I'm very thankful to have eaten such delicious, satisfying food, and to not feel sick or uncomfortable afterwards!


Breakfast: Nick's Amazing Baked Oatmeal

Lunch: Mixed Berry Pie

Dinner: Mashed Potatoes, Stuffing, Mushroom Gravy, Brussels Sprouts roasted with Balsamic Vinegar, Red Wine, Black Bean and Corn Salad, Green Beans, Mushrooms, & Onions

We had dinner out at a relative's house, so I don't have a picture.  I'll post a picture of all of the leftovers tomorrow!

Mixed Berry Pie

Wednesday, 11/27/13

Baked up a storm for Thanksgiving.  Between that and walking around my son's new school this morning, I'm a bit of a mess.  I felt great while doing it, and then tonight, my back and neck just seized up.  Trying to relax now and hoping for the best tomorrow!  Very thankful to have such good food to look forward to tomorrow.  I know it's not all about the food, but it still feels good to have food that I love, so that I won't be uncomfortable or feeling deprived around everyone else.


Breakfast:  Nick's Amazing Baked Oatmeal

Lunch: Mexican Rice & Beans over Salad (baby green spinach, romaine, yellow green peppers, cauliflower, carrots, cherry tomatoes)

Dinner: 4-3-2 Cheezy Rice & Broccoli

Tuesday, 11/26/13

 I ate some amazing food today!  None of the pictures do the meals justice, but they were all incredible.  The oatmeal was loaded with fruit, and the warm Mexican Beans & Rice were so good mixed up with a tossed salad.  Dinner was great, too.  I just can't get a good picture of the Stuffed Baby Bellas, but Nick gave them an 11 on a scale of 1-10.  I just love it when I cook and it all works out.  :)


Breakfast: Nick's Amazing Baked Oatmeal

Lunch: Mexican Beans & Rice with Cheeze Sauce over a Salad (baby spinach, romaine, carrots, yellow bell pepper, cauliflower, cherry tomatoes)

Dinner: Stuffed Baby Bellas

Monday, 11/25/13

Great day today!  Feeling good - more energy, more optimism.  Saw Dr. R this morning.  BP was 104/74!  This time a year ago it was 147/100.  Dr. R reminded me that, not so long ago, I was completely defeated, resigning myself to the fact that I would never get better.  I had given up.  Today, she was thrilled to see me looking forward, talking about the healing that has taken place and the healing that I trust is going to continue.  I'm thankful for the reminder, and for feeling as good as I feel today!


Breakfast: Blueberry Oatmeal

Lunch: Rainy Day Minestrone, sprinkled with nutritional yeast

Plain popcorn

Dinner: Mexican Beans & Rice with Cheeze Sauce; Salad: baby spinach, romaine, carrots, yellow bell pepper, cauliflower, cherry tomatoes

Sunday, 11/24/13

Breakfast:  Oatmeal with Apples and Bananas

Lunch:  Salad (greens, broccoli, carrots, cherry tomatoes); Asian Noodle Salad; Apple Cider
Out to lunch - no pics! :)



Dinner: Asian Noodle Salad; Rainy Day Minestrone

Hot Minty Cacao

 

Saturday, 11/23/13

My taste buds continue to change.  I didn't need added salt in my soup (a first), my plain popcorn tasted great to me, and I took a few bites of Napa cabbage and it tasted so good!  I love eating like this!


Breakfast: Chocolate Cherry Shake
(It was actually just a chocolate shake because I left out the cherries and just used ice cubes.)

Lunch: Rainy Day Minestrone (which changed from a delicious soup to a scrumptious stew!)

Plain popcorn
 

Dinner: Asian Noodle Salad

Glass of wine

Friday, 11/22/13

Breakfast: Blueberry Banana Oatmeal
 

Lunch: Green Bean Casserole, Spinach Dip

Dinner: Rainy Day Minestrone

Thursday, 11/21/13

Breakfast: Oatmeal with Blueberries, Apples, & Bananas (eaten on the way to an appointment, so no pictures!)

Lunch: Baked Potato, Cheeze Sauce, carrot sticks, Spinach Dip

Dinner: Green Bean Casserole, Pumpkin Pie (fail!)

Leftovers Wednesday, 11/20/13

Today was Leftovers Day!


Breakfast: MPBF Lentil Shepherd's Pie sprinkled with some nutritional yeast that I actually spilled on it!  :)

Banana

Lunch: Spinach 'n Rice

I also had some pumpkin pie that I didn't picture because I was too busy tasting it, again, and trying to adjust the recipe, again.  I may just admit defeat!  :)


Dinner: Brown Rice and Lentil Patties over a salad of mixed greens, cherry tomatoes, yellow bell pepper, carrots, and red onion, dressed with Ranch Dressing

Acknowledging the Little Things

I tend to have such an all or nothing attitude, and I'm working on changing that.  One way to change it is by taking the time to recognize the small things.  I've been eating a Protective Diet for about five months now, and I haven't seen any of my conditions cured.  I've had most of those conditions for eight years now, and yet I want them gone in five months!  I wish!  Even though they're not gone, there have been improvements:

1.  I get around easier than I used to.  There was a time when I relied on a walker, or could only take a few steps at a time.  Now, I can walk around the house without my problem.  I still have to think about the steps I take, my knee gives out sometimes, and I have a lot of lower back pain...but I'm walking!  I visualize myself walking briskly outside, like I used to love to do.  I even visualize myself running!

2.  The lymphedema has improved.  Although my legs are swollen and painful, they haven't been so swollen that I've needed to wrap them.  I used to have to wrap every single night and wear compression garments during the day.  I don't do that anymore!

 I love this picture!  

It shows exactly how I feel with my legs wrapped or bandaged.  

This man looks like such a great guy, 

and looks like he has a better attitude than I do about lymphedema!  :)

Again, I visualize my legs getting better and better, even though I've been told by doctors that that's impossible. 


3.  My attitude and outlook on life are so much better!  I am more positive, more focused, more compassionate, and more hopeful.  I used to be hopeless, and I'm here to say that hopeful is so much better!

Tuesday, 11/19/13

Breakfast:  Mixed fruit

Lunch: Seven Layer Salad

Dinner: Spinach 'n Rice; Vegan Chocolate and Black Cherry Ice Cream

Monday, 11/18/13

Another sleepless night dealing with asthma.  I'm sniffling but am determined not to catch anything!  Thankful for a shake to help wake me up, for leftovers, and for a partially prepared salad that I could finish up quickly!

Breakfast:  Chocolate Cherry Shake

Lunch: MPBF Lentil Shepherd's Pie, Clementines

Dinner: Seven Layer Salad

Sunday, 11/17/13

Rough day after a rough night.  I made it through.  The end.  :)


Breakfast:  Chocolate Cherry Shake, Raspberries

Chocolate Cherry Oatmeal to Go


Lunch:  Tomato Cream Sauce over Pasta with Spinach, Chocolate Cherry Oatmeal to 
Go

Dinner:  MPBF Lentil Shepherd's Pie